Hustler Holiday 2008

GIRLS 25 EDEN PETTY Pooling Her Resources Photography by Mark Lit 47 ASHLYNN BROOKE & KAYDEN KROSS Taking Her Cue Photography by Holly Randall 66 JANA COVA Holiday Pleasure Photography by Mark Lit 82 ALYSSA MORE More Than You Can Handle Photography by Holly Randall 112 SAMIRA Couch Tomato Photography by Matti Klatt 130 & JUSTIN MAGNUM Blondes Do Have More Fun Photography by Suze Randall 178 FAYE VALENTINE She Rocks! Photography by Mark Lit FEATURES 38 THE Q&A: VINCENT BUGLIOSI The prosecutor who sent Charles Manson and his lethal family to prison sets his sights on bringing George W. Bush to justice for murder. Interview by Maeve Scanlon & Bruce David 42 HUSTLER'S GAG GIFT GUIDE 'Tis the season to be funny: our outrageous suggestions for a horny and humorous holiday. 44 JAMIE KENNEDY: THE REASON FOR THE SEASON TV's subversive practical joker kicks the crap out of Christmas in a hysterically tasteless discussion with entertainment editor Keith Valcourt. 55 MUST-SEE FLYNT FLICK Our fearless publisher gets the movie treatment of his life in Larry Flynt: The Right to Be Left Alone. 56 A DAY IN THE LIFE OF TERA PATRICK Join the porn superstar with intimate lunches, frenzied personal appearances and snuggles with her hard-rock hubby. Journalist Ed Rampell reveals what the exotic Ms. Tera is like out of the bedroom. 64 WAX OFF Want to caress Madonna, J-Lo and Britney Spears? Now you can...sorta! 74 CHEMTRAIL CONUNDRUM Aerosol poison? Top-secret black ops project? Former White House environmental adviser Jeff Schweitzer, Ph.D., examines the ominous theories. 78 REMEMBERING GEORGE CARLIN Paul Krassner pays an affectionate tribute to his pal and the "Seven Words You Can't Say on Television." 80 ALLISON MARGOLIN Popped for pot? Quick, call L.A.'s Dopest Attorney. Writer T.R. McAlister accompanies the cannabis crusader on a tour of courtroom conflicts. STANDARDS 3 SEX PARODY Tres Sexys 7 PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT We Did Our Best by Larry Flynt 8 TECH KNOW ATV, guitar and win a surround sound speaker system 10 GAME ON Hot chicks & stolen cars 11 ROBERT SCHEER Uncle Sam: The Ultimate Sadist 13 NAT HENTOFF How Bush and the Democrats have screwed our privacy 15 ALEX BENNETT Is anybody really sorry now that newsman Tim Russert is dead? 17 FEEDBACK Election rants and Santa's helpers from Barely Legal 18 POLITICAL PARODY IndyMac Bank 19 ASSHOLE OF THE MONTH Jesse Helms 21 BITS & PIECES Erotica L.A., pussy purses and Bucky's holiday tips 36 HOT LETTERS Just what she wanted 37 CLASSIC CARTOONS Taste-free giggles from the past 60 THE GIRLS OF MYSPACE Kansas City's Holly Wood 63 ARIOCK PINUP 96 HUSTLER HUMOR Jokes and good filthy fun 98 SIGHTS & SOUNDS Interviews with Disturbed, J-Kwon and Cy Cumin, plus DVDs& CDs to give and get 102 MOVIE MAMMARIES Sexy Scientologists! 104 FAMOUS FLESH Tabloid tarts Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian and Naomi Campbell exposed! 107 MANCOW MULLER Radio star defends our right to bear arms—and his brother's right to sell cars! 109 TAILS OF THE BUNNYRANCH Another erotic adventure from the world's most famous bordello 120 COLLEGE REPORT A "juicy" Web site causes campus havoc nationwide 121 REAL COLLEGE GIRLS California Christmas cutie 123 EROTIC ENTERTAINMENT Hard-core stocking stuffers, plus a first look at Pirates II 141 BEAVER HUNT Unwrapped amateurs PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT WE DID OUR BEST This issue appears on newsstands three weeks before the Presidential election. By the time you read this, the election may be over. Whatever the final result, we have done our best to encourage a Democratic sweep. Over the past few years, HUSTLER has kept its readers informed on all the important issues, frequently publishing stories that the mainstream media has suppressed: the theft of the elections in 2000 and 2004, the lies of George W. Bush, the assault on the Constitution, the death of habeas corpus, the war on the middle class, etc. In my opinion, if this election cycle doesn't result in a Democratic sweep, you can kiss our democracy goodbye. We've sounded the alarm; if McCain gets elected, Americans have only themselves to blame. - Larry Flynt, Publisher