Hustler July 2009

GIRLS 26 ROSE New in Town Photography by Mark Lit 45 ALANA LOVE Pregnant Pause Photography by Mark Lit 61 HUSTLER CLASSIC Me, Jane September 1975 Pictorial 76 ALEXIS TEXAS Face Value Photography by Mark Lit 96 DIANA DOLL & MADELYN MARIE Caffight! Photography by Ladi von Jansky 114 JASMINE, SIMONE & MIKE Two Girls for Every Boy Photography by Andrew Beck 159 SADIE WEST Bedroom Eyes Photography by Holly Randall FEATURES 36 THE DIRTY POLITICS OF FOOD - PART 1 The government's supposed safety net green-lights toxic additives. Article by Science Editor-at-Large Debbie Epstein 40 BUDD HOPKINS ON ALIEN ABDUCTIONS The dark side of the UFO mystery. Iinterview by Skylaire Alfvegren 42 KEEP WATCHING THE SKIES! Sci-fi movie posters of yesteryear. Article by Ted Newsom 54 CLASSIC HUSTLER HONEYS Landmark centerfolds since '74. Retrospective by Mark Johnson 58 DWAINE TINSLEY: I, DRAWN TO CONTROVERSY What an innovative cartoonist! Tribute by K.R. Le Roque 68 JIM BOLEN: THE 48 WARRIOR SPIRIT Green Beret's valorous adventure. Interview by Ted Newsom 70 MAMIE VAN DOREN The '60s sex kitten still turns heads as a cougar goddess. Profile by Albert Pierce/Photos by Alien Mercer and Thomas Dixon 74 VIVA LUST VEGAS AVN expo lights up Sin City. by Keith Valcourt STANDARDS 3 SEX PARODY Fresh Step Cat Cum 7 PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT What's Wrong With the Republican Party? 9 TECH KNOW Win a Memory Master CD Recorder 10 GAME ON Lingerie-Clad Zombie Slayers! 11 ROBERT SCHEER Banking on Wall Street Bad Boys 13 NAT HENTOFF Immune From Justice? 15 ALEX BENNETT The Network News Report Card 17 FEEDBACK Porn for the Prez, nuke mudslinging and a classic American Honey 18 POLITICAL PARODY Sorry, Obama, They're Just Not That Into You 19 ASSHOLE OF THE MONTH Congressman John Boehner (R-Ohio) 21 BITS & PIECES Tina Fey gets dicked, booby beer bong and freaky centerfolds 34 HOT LETTERS Tit Lover's Tip-top Hookup 35 CLASSIC CARTOONS Funny then, hilarious now 53 TAILS OF THE BUNNYRANCH Unforgettably Awesome Party by Audrey 67 GINA KING PINUP 73 THE GIRLS OF MYSPACE Morale-raiser Casi Gray 88 HUSTLER HUMOR Dirty jokes that'll get you canned 90 SIGHTS & SOUNDS Staind's Aaron Lewis, plus the Revolution's Wendy & Lisa talk Prince 94 MOVIE MAMMARIES Rack star Marisa Tomei 95 FAMOUS FLESH Shauna Sand: Beach Blanket Bimbo 104 COLLEGE REPORT California student nabbed in Iran 105 REAL COLLEGE GIRLS Kinky coed Samara Mae 107 EROTIC ENTERTAINMENT Stormy Daniels mulls a Senate run, DP queen Adrianna Nicole talks tough, and Three's Company gets porned 124 BEAVER HUNT Unspoiled 'n' unabashed' amateurs PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE REPUBLICAN PARTY These days, all that Republicans do is blurt out angry sound bites about President Obama and the Democrats. Their position on a given issue changes from moment to moment. All that matters to them is how they can sabotage this administration. As Rush Limbaugh admitted, they just want Obama to fail. It doesn't matter to them that this would mean the country also fails. What explains such insanity? To answer that question you must remember the GOP is under the control of multinational corporations and Wall Street. Given the vast amounts of money at play, it only makes sense that the profiteers are terrified of losing their influence over government. So they send their political representatives out to attack the Democrats any way they can in the hope that something will stick. Don't get us wrong: We have nothing against companies making money. But elected officials should listen to the people, not a handful of bankers and CEOs. It's time for the GOP to help America succeed—not work to ensure its failure.