Hustler March 2011

GIRLS 29 APRIL O'NEIL Geek Goddess Photography by T Ritter 48 SAMANTHA SAINT Heavenly Body Photography by Matti Klatt 63 BREE DANIELS & BLAKE Lez Be Friends Photography by EarlMiller.com 76 CLAIRE SANDERS Built to Last Photography by Mark Lit 106 RHIAN ALISE Model Behavior Photography by Jose Luis 123 THIS AIN'T DANCING WITH THE STARS XXX Tangolicious twinkle toes Scarlett Fay, Dylan Ryder, Kiara Diane, Cody Love and Sindee Jennings are singin' and dancin' in the sheets! Photography courtesy HUSTLER Video 159 JESSICA Shades of Pink Classic Photography by Matti Klatt FEATURES 30 BLUE-SCREEN Our special Valentine's look at porn couples whose off-screen relationships don't always embody true love Article by Scott Fayner 42 ASPARTAME: DEATH BY DIET POP Are artificial sweeteners liquidating Gulf War veterans and civilians worldwide?! Report by Harvey Wasserman 46 WHO THE FUCK IS TONY CLIFTON?! Spewing lowbrow jokes 'n' toxic tunes, this mysterious lounge lizard is the rave Profile by Keith IValcourt 56 CUTTING EDGE: VAGINAL REJUVENATION A slice of life segment graphically detailing how a trailblazing cosmetic surgeon is clamping down on loose lips Article by Justin Hampton 72 PULP MAYHEM: A LOOK AT THE PROVOCATIVE ART OF H.J. WARD Damsel-in-distress magazine covers from the '30s and '40s that kept readers coming back for more Book Review by Anthony Petkovich 90 MECHELE HUGHES LINEHAN DEADLY ANGEL? Bizarre backstory of an Alaska stripper handed a 99-year sentence for murder Report by Fred Rosen STANDARDS 3 SEX PARODY Sucretariat 7 PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT By Larry Flynt 9 TECH KNOW Win a Killer 2100 gaming card! 10 GAME ON Fallout: New Vegas, Tron: Evolution, Pac-Man Party & Sniper: Ghost Warrior 11 ROBERT SCHEER Reversal of Fortunes 13 NAT HENTOFF Has the U.S. Supreme Court rear-ended the First Amendment? 15 ALEX BENNETT Best medicine in the world? My ass! 17 MAMIE VAN DOREN Fuck censorship! 19 FEEDBACK Confiscating a soldier's HUSTLER is downright un-American! 20 POLITICAL PARODY Join the Police Force! 21 ASSHOLE OF THE MONTH Mitch McConnell 23 BITS & PIECES Rockin' freedom party, This Ain't Avatar artificial vaj and Christine O'Donnell suckin' dick! 28 HOT LETTERS Twins' bedroom chicanery 37 CLASSIC CARTOONS 75 COUGARS UNLEASHED Voracious vamp Alexis Golden 88 HUSTLER HUMOR Eat up these jokes, folks! 94 SIGHTS & SOUNDS Bad Religion, Buzzcocks, cool discs! 98 FAMOUS FLESH Shauna Sand sans bikini top! 99 MOVIE MAMMARIES Amber Heard's skintillating rambles 100 PINUP by Sandra Chang 103 GIRLS OF FACEBOOK Lingerie footballer Natasha Eppright 104 COLLEGE REPORT UCSD reacts to "Compton Cookout" 105 REAL COLLEGE GIRLS Coed cutie Kenzie Taylor 114 EROTIC ENTERTAINMENT Charlie's Angels, The Twilight Zone and Avatar all go hard-core! 133 BEAVER HUNT A potpourri of sexy amateur heartthrobs