Hustler Holiday 2011

GIRLS 29 BIJOU A Classy Piece of Ass Photography by Holly Randall Productions 49 LUX KASSIDY A Ladies Only? Photography by Holly Randall Productions 64 KELLI McCARTY A Miss USA's Wild Ride Photography by Mark Lit 76 EDEN ADAMS A Ray of Sunshine Photography by Ladi von Jansky 104 AIDEN, ZOE & ELLE Three's Not a Crowd Photography by Holly Randall Productions 121 THIS AIN'T LADY GAGA XXX Helly Mae Hellfire offers tonsils 'n' twat the way you'd imagined the pop singer, with backing-slut vocals care of Aubrey Addams and Rihanna Rimes. Photography courtesy HUSTLER Video 161 THE TOY SHOPPE Classic Photography by Clive McLean FEATURES 38 ADAM GOLDBERG: JUST FAMOUS ENOUGH The neurotic actor discusses quirky roles, bad hangovers and his Lennonesque voice. Interview by Keith Valcoutt 42 SAMMIE SPADES Meet the chesty Hillary Clinton intern now starring in porn. Interview by Miley Morrison 58 HUSTLER'S FAKE HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE . Spoof by Keith Valcourt & Matt Hoge 61 A DAY IN THE LIFE: KELLI McCARTY From posing with a Prez to XXX glory, the ex-Miss USA tells all. Article by Scott Fayner 70 NICE CANS! Inebriating collection of really cool beer containers. Book Review by K.K. Le Roque 73 THE SHOCKING TRUTH ABOUT AYN RAND Could it be that the philosopher and novelist idolized by today's neoconservatives was inspired by a 1920s serial killer? Article by Mark Ames 90 G-SHOT PARTY Be a fly on the wall as a doctor hosts &shindig where he pokes his patients' vaginas with orgasm-bolstering injections. Report by Anka Radakovich STANDARDS 3 SEX PARODY: Period Blood 7 PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT by Larry Flynt 9 TECH KNOW: How to win four great gadgets 11 GAME ON: Smoky noirish dames, fallen angels and more 13 ROBERT SCHEER: Credit where credit is due 15 NAT HENTOFF: FBI now after your garbage 17 ALEX BENNETT: The news in review 2011 19 MAMIE VAN DOREN: What's sexy? 21 FEEDBACK: Manhattan madam bends our ear 22 POLITICAL PARODY: Florida is the place for families 23 ASSHOLE OF THE MONTH: Texas Governor Rick Perry 24 BITS & PIECES: Merry mermaids we'd like to marry, dildo-shaped X-traterrestrials and a Tamra Barney BJ fantasy 28 HOT LETTERS: "Uncle Craig" bangs Daddy's not-so-little girl 37 CLASSIC CARTOONS: Ya can't keep a good bon down! 88 HUSTLER HUMOR: Yucks from mirthful readers 94 SIGHTS & SOUNDS: Jason Mewes muses about Santa & Paris; plus super stocking stuffers! 98 FAMOUS FLESH: Lady Gaga's glorious tatas 99 MOVIE MAMMARIES: Jordana Brewster's racy flicks 100 PINUP: by Jessica Dougherty 102 COLLEGE REPORT: Longhorns fight budget cuts 103 REAL COLLEGE GIRLS Heavenly-looking Odette 113 EROTIC ENTERTAINMENT Everything from a hard-core Incredible Hulk to Chyna's backdoor debut 132 BEAVER HUNT: Mistletoe maidens 156 LARRY FLYNT'S D.C. UNCOVERED 157 BOTTOMS UP! Holiday beers & spirits 158 COUGARS UNLEASHED Carnal-crazed Cassandra? 159 GIRLS OF FACEBOOK: Skin-mag virgin CJ Sparxx